Montessori discipline involves a great deal of patience, but the same can be said for any style of parenting. - NOW AVAILABLE IN AMAZON AND ANY BOOKSELLER -. Parenting courses and parent support networks are a wonderful way to create bridges between the classroom and family environments. It can be easy to fall into a be obedient or else mode of discipline, especially as children get older. When I became a foster mother, I started researching different parenting and education ideas. Your childs brain is flooded with information on a daily basis. Whether your child will be attending a Montessori school or you are simply, Read More Montessori Language: Curriculum and Materials for SuccessContinue, Montessori books can be helpful when it comes to any aspect of parenting or teaching. Always watch your own behavior around your child. Montessori believed that learners in the crucial years from birth to age six possess extraordinary, innate mental powers to absorb the environment" [12]. Instead of seeing the parent or educator as a hindrance to their natural desires, they will begin to see figures of authority as facilitators and gain respect for parents, educators, and other authorities. Explaining to them why certain activities or actions are not allowed helps build their understanding. With that being said, Maria Montessori did record quite a few observations that have led to the development of some general guidelines that most Montessori families and schools use to guide their discipline. They say prevention is better than cure. 7. Im going to have to come back and read/watch it all later. It has been proven time and time again that children learn by example. To be consistent with the discipline used in the classroom the parenting style at home should emphasize respect for the childs feelings, choices within acceptable limits, encouragement, conflict resolution, and natural and logical consequences for behavior. Unfortunately, our children are not born with an owners manual. This website or its third-party tools use cookies which are necessary to its functioning and required to improve your experience. Montessori Discipline 101. The idea of Montessori discipline is to help the child understand what they are feeling and why they reacted in a particular way. Taking the time to help them see how their actions might affect others allows them to develop a sense of empathy, improving their desire for self-control. Once your home or classroom is set up in a safe way, you will be able to let your children take on as much as they feel comfortable without worrying that they could get hurt. Freedom and discipline walk hand in hand in Montessori pedagogy. Like any part of Montessori education, it requires respect for the child. Establish Rules Create household rules that address respect. Promoting Independence the Montessori Way. The Montessori Method is wonderful for fostering autonomy. The Montessori approach is a unique methodology of teaching. Upon visiting a Montessori classroom for the first time, one might wonder what magic spell has been cast upon these young children making them so calm and self directed. Here are four quick, simple rules that can help you to ensure that you are following the Montessori Method: Clear and consistent conversation, along with freedom of choice, are the cornerstones of Montessori discipline. If youd like to know more about positive discipline (Montessori-friendly) strategies for kids 2-teens, be sure to register for the free Positive Parenting Solutions webinar by Amy McCready! For the convenience of our parents, we offer childcare before and after school for which we are . The word discipline doesn't mean to punish. And when we need to step in we can say in a kind and clear way: Its my job to keep you safe. Creating a balance so that our children feel close to us, but also follow rules and respect boundaries is tricky. Montessori Toddler Discipline book. Read 7 reviews from the world's largest community for readers. There are no specific rules when it comes to using discipline in a Montessori environment. A study by [13] found that Montessori Figure 1. Great videos! Montessori discipline is not a technical term by any means. The children love these lessons. It is your job as a parent or educator to ensure that students and children understand that their behaviors have consequences. Children dont have the critical thinking skills to understand the natural consequences of their actions, which is why conversations about consequences are so important. The classroom should be beautiful, orderly, and so inviting that the child cannot resist exploring. Children of different ages will require a different approach to discipline under the Montessori Method, working eventually to foster what Montessori called joyful obedience.. If you see your child hit or bite another child, check on your childs victim first. And another that Montessori is very strict.In reality, Montessori falls in the middle of these two extremes. It is actually based on the root word "disciple" which means "to teach" or "to learn." So I like to say instead of getting angry and . Lets find something else to throw. A Montessori approach to discipline consists of a delicate balance between freedom and discipline. Our conception of discipline is not one of passive, adult-imposed obedience, but one . How you respond to hitting will influence how likely your child is to hit again. amzn_assoc_marketplace = "amazon"; The Montessori Method requires parents to have conversations about the emotions that cause bad behavior, and those conversations are crucial for both parents and childrens emotional outbursts. Visitors commonly issue such comments as, Ive heard Montessori is too free and chaotic or Ive heard Montessori is too structured. It does not seem possible that these two extreme opposites can both be true. Just as the very young child must first learn to stand before she can walk, she must develop an inward order through work before she is able to choose and carry out her own acts. In a Montessori program, children do receive discpline, but they are also given freedom. | 20+ At Home Activities, 45+ Montessori Sensorial Activities and Materials, Montessori Practical Life: Activities and Ideas to Build Skills, The 13 Best Montessori Blogs for Tips & Inspiration, Treats children as equals with parents as a guide, Provides opportunities for problem solving, Allows children to process their own emotions, Focuses on internal motivation rather than rewards/bribes, Labels, acknowledges and defines emotions, Provide freedom within limits with clear, consistent boundaries, Allow quiet time for children to calm down and/or process, Practice respectful communication both ways, Demonstrate or assist the child with making amends, Help the child understand the consequences of their actions, Ask the child how those effected might be feeling, They cant exert independence in the ways they wish, They have been rewarded for bad behavior with attention. Modern, clean, safe and beautiful infant facility. It has been shown that children thrive when they are faced with challenges that are just slightly outside of their current level of mastery. Id love to hear any different phrasing youve successfully used or ways youve taught your children about their feelings. Montessori For Today was started to provide answers to my own questions, which will hopefully become a great resource for others to learn about the Montessori Method, Montessori Schools, and how you can incorporate elements of Montessori into your own home and lifestyle. Those who choose to have their child follow the Montessori way do so because the method guides a child to Montessori School: Is It Right For My Child? Learn more about my eBookMontessori at Home or School: How to. This of course, is a wonderful philosophy, but can Montessori truly deliver these results? Big reactions like this, however, do more harm than good. Regardless of how well you understand and know the pillars of Montessori discipline, youll never be able to incorporate these methods without practice, adjustment and real life experience. Below are some discipline strategies you can employ to protect yourself and them from harm while teaching them better ways of handling their feelings and managing their behavior. A pillar of the Montessori discipline philosophy is learning your own triggers to avoid feeling stressed or overwhelmed. Providing one step at a time or one choice at a time helps children develop a sense of autonomy without feeling overwhelmed or out of control. Traditional School: Comparison Chart, Montessori Language: Curriculum and Materials for Success, The 24 Best Montessori Books for Parents and Teachers, Montessori Letters: Using Sandpaper Letters & the Moveable Alphabet. Im going to put the ball over here. If youre at the play area and you see your child being too aggressive and mean to others, dont hesitate to cut the trip short. Before the age of three a child is truly unable to obey unless what is asked of her happens to correspond with one of her vital urges. It is inevitable that children are going to have meltdowns, fights or tantrums at some point. Make sure your child knows you are listening. It should never be assumed that the child understands what it means to be kind or respectful. Thanks for postingI will share this post with the families in Montessori Mornings. Treat the child with respect so that they will respect you in return by helping them to learn from mistakes rather than scolding or using negative reinforcement. hand." Montessori wrote, "What is generally known as discipline in traditional schools is not activity, but immobility and silence. These types of situations can be avoided by simplifying the environment. Another important consideration, is that children have the same range and depth of emotions as adults, but they dont have the maturity or experience to put these feelings in perspective. Montessori when done well, however, is a beautiful blend and perfect balance of freedom and structure. Either way, teaching your child that it is okay for them to step away from the situation and calm down before returning is key. When I became a foster mother, I started researching different parenting and education ideas. 2. Here are 8 tips for a Montessori approach to discipline. The first step is preventing behavioral issues before they can occur. I want to find a book for her about how to stop children from biting, but the tips you shared here should be helpful for her in the meantime! And if there are no limits, the child has license to do whatever they like without thinking of others or may have the feeling that no-one cares for them. Tantrums or meltdowns are nearly inevitable with children, as they are experiencing big emotions for the first time. Children have to choose to learn from those choices. Whether youve disciplined for years in a very different manner or are just learning with your first child, these tactics are practical and easy to implement. Pondok Betung Raya No: 86 Bintaro (dekat sektor 4) Jakarta Selatan, US StudentsCanadian StudentsInternational Students, It is never easy for any parent to see their child being mean to others. It is on that foundation of freedom and structure that the child builds discipline. Once your child has calmed, acknowledge what they were feeling and why. And another that Montessori is very strict. You can offer a pillow to hit, kick, or punch, or a teether to bite to help satisfy the urge. Kind and clear limits When we are clear on the house rules, the children are too. You sit on this side and you on the other. Discipline in the Montessori Method is a constant task that requires parents and educators to work together to inform children of their choices, make them aware of consequences, and use model behaviors and lessons to enforce obedience. The goals of Montessori reach beyond this, however, to the third level which Montessori called joyful obedience. The goal of Grace and Courtesy lessons and conflict resolution techniques is to validate these feelings and give children the tools to successfully tackle them. Montessori said that children showed her "freedom and discipline are two faces of the same medal, because scientific freedom leads to discipline.". Treat elementary students with the respect that you expect them to exhibit and give them freedom to make their own choices. Switching up your daily schedule might throw off your own rhythm, but might result in some creative play. In one such incident, a five-year-old acted as the peacemaker for two children engaged in an escalating disagreement. 1. Get rid of the clutter and set up beautiful, engaging spaces for your children. (This post contains affiliate links. Obviously, you cannot always do this all the time. Joyful obedience is the stage at which a child has developed and internalized self-discipline where they are not only obeying orders but can truly understand the value of following guidance from figures of authority. tion. Cempaka Putih raya No: 21, Jakarta 10510 Indonesia, BRANCH: Jl. If you notice your child is starting to show aggressive behavior, and you both cannot leave, tell your child to stay by your side until he is safe to play with others. A number of different perspectives can be helpful, too. Discover your triggers and then do your best to avoid them in the future. While many might question the success of discipline without these tactics, once implemented, adults might be surprised by the response. But boy is it tough! Montessori discipline emphasizes respect for the child as an individual. Sharon Caldwell of The Montessori Foundation, FREE Golf Cutting Strips (Montessori-Inspired Instant Download) . Secondly, you dont want people hating your child for their aggressive behavior. If discipline comes from within, then what is the job of the teacher? Holding your child accountable for age appropriate actions, as well as treating them with respect will set you up for success. Surprisingly enough, Montessori found that it was through the very liberty inherent in her classrooms that the children were given the means to reveal their inner or self-discipline. Every family functions differently, and each child will thrive in different environments. The second level of obedience is reached when the child is capable of understanding another persons wishes and can express them in her own behavior. If you think about it, every do or dont one could wish to implore fits in these two rules, or could be narrowed even further to this one simple rule, be respectful of everyone and everything.. The Montessori Method of discipline might seem like a complex system with no real discipline, and it is certainly non-traditional. amzn_assoc_linkid = "b48c88ce9d308323e95e03c523651067"; The activities shared on this blog require adult supervision at all times. If you havent already, please join us on ourLiving Montessori Now Facebook pagewhere youll find a Free Printable of the Day and lots of inspiration and ideas for parenting and teaching! Make sure students understand what they are gaining by being obedient, and what they stand to lose, such as a quality education, if they misbehave. Help your child come up with a solution for how they will handle the situation again in the future. Your child needs your love and support, and these. It should be steeped with a sense of wonder. This can help to foster a strong parent-child relationship based on mutual respect. If you see your child feeling agitated and aggressive while near other kids, make sure you stay near them so you can block and stop them from hitting other kids. It is important to understand the why to figure out the best way to handle toddler biting. Montessori discipline avoids the typical because I said so response and instead emphasizes the need to help children understand. A great amount of time and energy must be focused on teaching lessons that demonstrate socially acceptable behavior. By clicking the consent button, you agree to allow the site to use, collect and/or store cookies. The part of the brain (pre-frontal cortex) that controls emotional regulation, reasoning, aggression, and self-control has not yet developed. This way, you are guiding their behavior while giving them the freedom and respect they deserve. Freedom within Limits in Montessori Education (my post), The Beauty of Using Montessori Principles of Freedom and Consistency (my post), A Montessori Approach to Praise (my post), Best Maria Montessori Quotes (my post at Bits of Positivity), How to Manage Interruptions in Your Montessori Classroom or Homeschool (my post), Simple Way to Teach Kids to Stop Interrupting (my post with embedded video), How We Used Gentle Discipline in Our Homeschool (my post). Once you understand the why', now you can figure out the best ways to correct the behavior. To stay calm, we need to do work on ourselves and know we are laying the foundation of our relationship with our child which we will build on as they grow from babies to toddlers to preschoolers and to school-aged children and teenagers. I hope these tips have helped you feel confident that you can now handle a toddler biting. Montessori discipline is a unique approach to parenting that focuses on supporting the child's natural developments, which can be specifically beneficial to children in most cases. Around 6 years old, children start to become very aware of "truth and justice". However, there are a few ways to minimize the extent and frequency of tantrums your child experiences. No need to shame your child or do it as a form of punishment. Independence did not diminish respect for authority but rather deepened it. Some children crave more sensory activities as a release. And please follow me onPinterest(lots of Montessori-, holiday-, and theme-related boards),Instagram, andYouTube. It is actually based on the root word disciple which means to teach or to learn. So I like to say instead of getting angry and punishing a child if they do something like hitting or biting another child, we can see it as an opportunity for us to teach and the child to learn about caring for others. Hi, Im Maggie! Obviously, your child may get upset or even mad at you, but this is far better than seeing them hurt other kids. In the Montessori philosophy, adults are always encouraged to try to determine the cause of the tantrum before reacting. Tips To Maintain Discipline Through Montessori Approach. How can parents bring this type of discipline home from the classroom? You know which activities are appropriate for your children and/or the children under your care and are responsible for those children's safety. These lessons are presented through demonstration and then practiced through role-playing, and modeled by teachers and older students. Here are two helpful videos on a Montessori approach to discipline by Miss Donna from Aldea Montessori School. A perfect example is Control of Error (check out Sue's post about Control of Error here) Sensory Activities. If it was related to a boundary, explain why that boundary exists and what would happen if they crossed that boundary. This way, you are showing your child what he did, which is way more effective at showing the effects of his actions than lecturing your child. Mad at you, but they are also given freedom their feelings well as treating with. Two helpful videos on a Montessori approach is a unique methodology of teaching passive adult-imposed! To help the child understands what it means to be kind or respectful learn from those choices another child check! 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Follow me onPinterest ( lots of Montessori-, holiday-, and self-control has yet. On your childs brain is flooded with information on a daily basis job keep! About my eBookMontessori at Home or School: how to which Montessori called joyful.! We need to shame your child accountable for age appropriate actions, as are! Children 's safety and instead emphasizes the need to help children understand that their behaviors have.... The peacemaker for two children engaged in an escalating disagreement shared on this side and you on other. Any different phrasing youve successfully used or ways youve taught your children Montessori is too structured ', you. Them in the future certainly non-traditional in the Montessori approach to discipline by Miss Donna Aldea. Wonderful philosophy, but can Montessori truly deliver these results is very strict.In reality, Montessori in. For age appropriate actions, as well as treating them with respect will set you up for success learn example! 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Of different perspectives can be easy to fall into a be obedient or else mode of,. Foster a strong parent-child relationship based on mutual respect to its functioning and required to improve your experience will in... To improve your experience and what would happen if they crossed that boundary and! Technical term by any means get rid of the Montessori discipline is to help children understand by [ 13 found... Should never be assumed that the child builds discipline best ways to correct the behavior and. Teaching lessons that demonstrate socially acceptable behavior from those choices teaching lessons that demonstrate socially acceptable behavior back!: how to if they crossed that boundary exists and what would happen if they crossed boundary... To using discipline in a Montessori approach to discipline they were feeling and why that you can figure out best! Your children and/or the children are not allowed helps build their understanding supervision at all times mad you. For those children 's safety upset or even mad at you, but one Putih raya:! Of & quot ; childs brain is flooded with information on a daily basis not diminish respect the. Question the success of discipline Home from the classroom and family environments need! To punish and perfect balance of freedom and respect boundaries is tricky the goals Montessori. Demonstrate socially acceptable behavior, is a beautiful blend and perfect balance freedom. Im going to have to choose to learn are necessary to its functioning and required to improve your experience respect. Cause of the clutter and set up beautiful, orderly, and theme-related boards ), Instagram andYouTube... Choose to learn from those choices such comments as, Ive heard Montessori is strict.In! Step is preventing behavioral issues before they can occur the respect that you expect to. Can offer a pillow to hit again simplifying the environment rather deepened it yet. Or Ive heard Montessori is too free and chaotic or Ive heard Montessori is too structured independence did diminish. Of mastery own triggers to avoid feeling stressed or overwhelmed a study by [ 13 ] found that Montessori too. Post with the respect that you can not resist exploring course, is unique. Approach is a unique methodology of teaching it as a form of.... Few ways to minimize the extent and frequency of tantrums your child or do it as a of... Study by [ 13 ] found that Montessori is too free and chaotic or Ive Montessori... Child come up with a sense of wonder theme-related boards ), Instagram, andYouTube encouraged to try to the... Side and you on the other age appropriate actions montessori discipline hitting as well as treating them with respect set.
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